Threshold of the new year is an invitation for us to reflect on the passing year and make a new start for the coming. Today’s cover page article on “Forgiveness” in the Pune Mirror brought a refreshing perspective on forgiveness as a way to dissolve our old hurts, angst and helplessness, and, create new possibilities in the coming year. It made me contemplate on what forgiveness means to me.
What is forgiveness, really?
Forgiveness is a magical mantra that can
Dissolve eons of hurt
In an instance
Forgiveness is an ancient wisdom
that healed broken hearts; restored sanity
And weaved the quilt to keep our children warm
Forgiveness is a paradox that’s simultaneously
Selfish— serving the deep individual need to be free
And selfless— opening our hearts to others vulnerability
Forgiveness is a choice that refreshes the earth,
Soft, tilled, black soil
Ready for rebirth
Forgiveness is the only way a victim is
Liberated from the prison of lifelong misery
Riding the wings of grace and compassion
Forgiveness is where the anger of past
And the fear of future dissolves in
The present moment
You and I are mere parts
In the grand play
Now relaxing in the script we never wrote
How do I forgive in true sense?
True forgiveness is not a transaction triggered by an apology
Sometimes, eyelids are more expressive than lips
Silence has more sorrow than “sorrys”
Regrets are realisations too fine for linguistics
Then why do we get stuck?
Waiting forever for a well articulated confession
Forgiveness is an inner journey that starts only when
A soul sees the self-destructive pay-off of nurturing hurt
Pointless power game of victimhood
And disproportionate suffering on behalf of a collective
that we have little or no memory of
Forgiveness is a calling for
The courage of Rama,
Fierceness of Shiva,
Grace of Shakti
And innocence of a butterfly
It is a radical simplicity—
of seeing yourself mirrored in the others
Acknowledging the broken humanness
Dropping the sword of vengeance
Becoming the Sovereign
And embracing the wounded heart!
Where do I begin?
Oh my bleeding heart!
How deeply I long to forgive
Most of all, my own self!
For failing to stand for my innocence
All those faces, I love to despise
Hold a piece of my broken heart
Standing in a hesitant circle around me
Hoping to return what’s truly mine
As the year ends
I restore the lost pieces of my heart
Sitting alone with my brokenness
Letting others dissolve within
For the old soul taught us
“Wound is where the light enters…”
Wish you a wonderful new year!
The Sacred Well
December 31st 2017
[Poetry & Pictures by Manish Srivastava]
5 questions that helped me in practicing forgiveness and freeing my inner power:
[I am a practitioner and a poet. I need to integrate the insights in my practice. So, I reflected on 5 questions to help me release old hurts from 2017 and stepping in 2018 with new energy. Adding them below, in case, the practitioner-in-you longs to take similar journey]
- HURT: This year, what were the moments when I felt most angered, hurt, helpless or victimised? By whom and when?
- MY NEEDS: What needs/values of mine were most compromised? What are my regrets from self?
- OTHER’S VULNERABILITY: What might be the helplessness/stuckness/ fears that others might have experienced that made them behave the way they did?
- LET-GO: What is the burden (hurt, emotions, old story, memory etc) that I do not wish to carry anymore? What I am ready to let-go off now?
- HONOUR: How can I truly honour my deep needs/ values myself in future? What learning, resources, strengths I have gathered in all these year(s) to honour myself?